She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
