i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
