His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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