When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
