Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
