Midget sex pt 2 tonight
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
