I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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