Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
