I'm so fucking centered right now
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
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