I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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