p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
