WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
