a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
