Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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