Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Randomize
