a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Randomize
