The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
