doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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