you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
