I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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