are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
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