I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
