I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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