The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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