its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
