this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
