I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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