I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
