I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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