Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
