member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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