using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
