And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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