i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
as a side note pls kill me
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
