You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
