So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I just found puke in my bra..
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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