How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
