At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize