i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
