People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
