oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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