Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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