It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
