Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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