so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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