yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
