so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize