Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
