I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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