My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
