She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
