so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize